This really spoke to me: “ Moderation might work for some people, but it would never work for me. When I was telling myself that I should just moderate my drinking, I was willfully ignoring the many times that I had already tried and failed at moderation”

The moderation half-truth is a huge hang up. I discuss it in my article about Grieving Being Sober While Grieving.

https://medium.com/grief-road/grief-road-chapter-4-grieving-being-sober-while-grieving-bdf84b345bc5